This is Why I Hate the Medical Profession

When I lived in Central Pennsylvania, I had the best doctor.  He would listen to everything I had to say, would take me seriously, would make me feel like I mattered.  He wouldn’t overindulge me; if I was being crazy, he’d tell me.  He seemed like he truly cared.

Since moving to Jersey, though, I’ve been to several different doctors.  All of them have been…. less than stellar to put it nicely.

We need doctors.  I cannot self-diagnose and medicate myself, no matter how much I would like to.  We are forced to trust them, to put our lives in their hands…. and it’s crushing when they brush you off and fail to listen.

I know my body better than anyone else does.  I live with it every moment of every day.  I know that the way I’m feeling is not normal because I didn’t feel like this before receiving the Depo Shot in 2009.  I can identify the changes; my husband can identify the changes; my close friends can identify the changes.

I went to a doctor in early 2010 for these issues, and he brushed me off.  One of the symptoms of whatever I have is difficulty losing weight.  That was the first thing I mentioned to him.  He told me I just needed to lower my deficit and have patience.  When I started to mention the other symptoms (which include changes in my menstrual cycle, changes in my skin, loss of interest in sex, increased anxiety/depression, mood swings, water retention/crazy thirst, and memory loss/difficulty staying on track to name a few), he just told me they were nothing to worry about.

I have severe anxiety, so it’s hard for me to ask or push for things.  So, I just felt like maybe he was right and let it go.

I spent the next two and a half years trying everything I could to lose weight and get over my symptoms.  I’ve been to therapy and tried medication.  I strictly counted calories and ate different amounts to see what worked.  I’ve tried low-carb, low-fat, weight-watchers (well, I used the free calculators I found online.  I never paid for it), everything.  Nothing I did helped with any of my symptoms.  The mental issues, the anxiety especially, have actually worsened.

I finally decided that enough was enough and made an appointment with a new doctor.  The initial appointment wasn’t too bad, but it wasn’t great.  I wrote about it here if you’re interested.

So, I had normal blood panels done along with thyroid tests.  I webMDed myself into believing my issues were thyroid related, so I was unprepared for my results today.

Everything came back normal, except my bad cholesterol is a tad high, and my good cholesterol is moderately low.  That means it’s not my thyroid.

I don’t even know where to start with the appointment today.  It was made of all sorts of fail, and I just don’t know how to explain it.  The nurse was complaining the whole time about how busy they were (which, I made this appointment two weeks ago.  I don’t care if you overbooked, don’t complain to me about it.).  She asked me what I was there for, printed my results, and left me to wait for the doctor.

This doctor has no bedside manners.  I noticed this at my last appointment as well.  She was short with me both times and didn’t go out of her way to talk to me if she didn’t have to.

She finally came in the room, asked me what I was there for (Ugh, I hate how they do this. Seriously, I just told the nurse.  She noted it in my chart.  Look at that before coming in the room, please.)  I told her I was there for my test results and that the nurse had printed them for her.

She hands me the stack of papers she was holding and said, ‘Yeah, I know.  Here they are.’  Why ask me why I’m there if you already know?  She then went over them with me.  She told me I had to add a half hour of cardio every day to lower my cholesterol.  That means she expects me to do over an hour and a half of hard cardio every day.  Way to look at my history, doctor.

She told me my thyroid was fine, and tried to leave the room.  I stopped her to ask about what I should do next.  Just because my thyroid tests came back negative doesn’t mean that my symptoms went away.  She pulled up my chart on the computer and read back the symptoms I told her last time.  All she noted was anxiety and trouble losing weight, none of the other things.  I had gone in with a list of symptoms that covered a piece of notebook paper front and back.

She told me that I needed to see a therapist or something for my anxiety and depression, which I was aware of already, and that I had to workout harder and eat less to lose weight. She said that all of my issues were in my head.

I tried to point out more of my symptoms to her.  She said, ‘I tested your thyroid like you asked, I don’t know what else you want.’

I responded with, ‘I never thought it was my thyroid.  I’ve thought this is a progesterone deficiency since the start.  You’re the one that decided to run the thyroid test.’

She went on a rant about how they test the thyroid for anyone having weight loss issues.  She said that I don’t have a progesterone deficiency because I have my period more than once every three months.

So, I asked what we should do now because I still have all of these symptoms.  I was crying at this point.  Words cannot describe my frustration level.

She just looked at me and said, ‘if that’s everything, have a good day.’  Then she walked out of the room before I could answer.

I just don’t even know where to start complaining about this or explaining how it made me feel.

It’s so hard to know that something is wrong and have no one want to listen.  It’s hard to have no one take your concerns seriously.

I just feel like I don’t matter, like I’m less of a person.  All I want is to be heard and taken seriously.  Just because I’m not a doctor doesn’t mean that I’m not educated and intelligent.  Just because I didn’t spend all that time and money to go through medical school doesn’t mean I’m not capable of doing so.  Just because one test (That I didn’t ask for) came back negative doesn’t mean that I’m making everything up.

I left there crying, and am currently waiting for the office manager to call me back.  I’m definitely complaining about this doctor’s behavior.  It was way out of line.  (….and I’m amazed at how much my anger has overruled my anxiety.  Normal me would never be able to call and complain about something!)

I am a human being, and I deserve to be respected.  I deserve to be heard.  I deserve to be taken seriously.

I just don’t understand why she wouldn’t order the tests I want.  Even if she doesn’t think I need them, doesn’t the office/lab make money?  Don’t doctors order unneeded tests all the time?  I don’t understand why she couldn’t order them just to appease me.

 

What am I going to do now?  I thought about giving up, but that just made me more upset. So, I’m going to keep trying to get answers.  I read stories all the time about people who were misdiagnosed or not diagnosed at all.  Doctors like this aren’t an anomaly.  From what I’ve heard, it’s actually pretty common.

I just wish I could stand up for myself a bit more.  Maybe I would have been able to get the right tests back in 2010 or two weeks ago.  Maybe doctors wouldn’t treat me like this.  I know I seem weak to them, so they brush me to the side.

I’m not giving up, though.

I made an appointment with a new doctor.  It’s on Monday evening, and Daniel said he’d try to go with me.  I’m going to take my list of symptoms.  I’m going to ask directly for the tests I think I need, but be open to what he has to say.  I’m going to stand up for myself, or, ya know, let Daniel stand up for me.

If he doesn’t listen, I’m going to try another doctor.  I pulled up the list of doctors that accept my insurance in our area, sorted them by distance, and started at the top.  I’ll just keep going down the list until I’m treated like a human, until I’m not brushed to the side.

If all that fails, I found a site where you can order saliva testing online.  It’s expensive, and I’ll have to take the results to a doctor for treatment anyway.  So, it’s going to be my last resort  but at least it’s there.

 

Don’t worry, guys.  I’m also going to find a new psychiatrist.  I obviously need anxiety medication.  I’ve been dealing with them since I was really young.  They’re just worse lately.  So, I know they won’t go away completely without specialized care.  All this stress cannot be good for me, and I know I need to get it under control.

 

I’d just like to tell all of the people in the medical profession that it is NOT ok to treat people like this.  It is not ok to brush them aside because you’re busy.  Put yourself in their shoes.  How would you feel if someone didn’t want to take five minutes to listen to you because they’re busy?  How would you feel if you were left undiagnosed because someone didn’t want to listen to your concerns?

You were the one that went to school for whatever medical job you have.  You made the decision to get a job helping people.  So, do your job and stop treating people like they don’t matter.

 

 

Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think I made it all the way through this without swearing.  I’m pretty proud of this.

Signature

About pamasaurus

"I have learned to keep to myself how exceptional I am." ~Mason Cooley I'm a married stay at home mom living in Southern New Jersey. I have one daughter and three furbabies. I love to cook. I love to craft. I love to sew. I just.... love to create in general. I also am pretty fond of adventuring, of exploring new places. I'm shy when I first meet people, but once I'm comfortable with them, you can't shut me up. I'm crazy and silly. I have an unhealthy obsession with dinosaurs.
This entry was posted in daniel, illness, serious and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

28 Responses to This is Why I Hate the Medical Profession

  1. Jecca says:

    You know I know how you feel. My Doctor is the same way. I was going in with headaches and nose bleeds (That I still get) and he just shrugs it all off. Doctors care more about making a quota and being paid than the patience they are suppose to be caring for. I’ve had some good doctors in my past, but the ones I’ve had lately and in the past 8 or so years are just assholes.

    You sound like your on the right track with going to another doctor. Keep going until you find one that works for you and doesn’t treat you like you are there for them to grace you with their presence. I’m proud of you for making a stand.

    Maybe you need to get out the the house more? Remember last time you started working, and your anxiety went away a little. It seems to grow when you are home a lot. A therapist would be good, just to be able to talk out the things you need to. It really does help.

    Love you BFFF!

    • pamasaurus says:

      Love you, too BFFF!

      Doctors are just UGH. Sorry you’re dealing with the same deal. You need someone to go with you to yell at your doctor for brushing you off… because I’m definitely taking Daniel if it works out with his schedule. Besides, I don’t know if I could stand to go alone, ya know? I’m just so blaaaaaah.

      Something I’ve noticed… it’s always this time of year when I decide to get a job, haha. I think it’s something with the season change, like I’m not getting enough sun or something. I’m still getting out like once a week with Megan, and then running has been helping. I don’t know. I don’t want to get a job when I’m going to be dealing with all these medical shizzles. Maybe once I get it all straightened out. I’ve definitely thought about it, though!

      <3<3<3

  2. Well, I’m feeling your pain today. I had an experience with the medical assistant of one of my physicians today and because I KNOW what to ask for – when she couldn’t answer me or find certain test results that should have been charted at least 6 days ago – I asked her exactly what her worth to me or any of the paying patients was! Then she had to gall to ask if I had private insurance or Medicaid – of course I blasted her saying I have private insurance but for her even thinking of treating the two pay sources differently as that could cause her boss to lose her contract with Medicaid – but, enough about me. You love the computer – go on there and google the dr. from today. Every dr. is on some sort of rating system – even if there is no rating. Rate her or him! People look for that when searching for a dr. You could call the New Jersey Board of Physicians and ask for a form to make a complaint – you paid for a service that you are not satisfied with and you deserve make that known to people who CAN make a difference. Telling a woman that “it is all in her head” is an old standard that is generally left to Male physicians but to be perpetrated by a female really kind of pisses me off! Okay, off my soap box now. Sorry – Keep trying different doctors until you find a good one! I promise it will be worth it!

    • pamasaurus says:

      Ugh! Sorry you had to deal with that medical assistant! I’m just… speechless about the medical profession lately. I feel like everyone I talk to has a story like this. I understand that working with the public is a hard job; I’ve done customer service and it sucks. You have to learn how to separate it though so it doesn’t affect your job.

      Thanks for the suggestions. I’m definitely going to look her up and ‘review’ her everywhere I can. The office manager never called me back, so I’ll have to call back there tomorrow. Then I’ll look into the NJBoP because no one should ever be treated the way I was today.

      Thanks <3

      • kalamitykelli says:

        I’m glad I could help. I am apalled myself at what “medical professionals” are allowed to get away with today. I had an ultrasound the other day – I used to do those myself – and the tech kept talking on her call phone while she was trying to get the pictures. I told her if she missed one, I had taken a picture of her talking on her phone (violation of HIPAA regulation) during my procedure. She nearly threw her phone down and guess what? she didn’t get the right pix! Now, she’s in trouble.

      • pamasaurus says:

        What? How rude could someone be? Ugh. She deserves to be in trouble!!

  3. msdulce says:

    I’m so sorry for what you’ve had to go through. It’s seriously disgusting that doctors don’t have to undergo more interpersonal training… they’re treating a PERSON, not a bunch of symptoms to push out the door. I really hope you find someone who’s an actual, good doctor because you’re right, you deserve much much better.

    • pamasaurus says:

      Thank you <3

      I really think they should be required to take at least one class in bedside manners or how to be a decent human being.

  4. sagarika says:

    this kind of thing happens to everyone atleast once. even I went through this one time. Hope you get a good doc nxt time..

  5. Ugh…that’s so terrible! I’m sorry that you have to deal with such awful doctors.
    I’ve had my share of terrible, TERRIBLE doctors in the past, so I can definitely sympathize. Just keep on doing what you’re doing and look for a good one. YOU hire THEM. THEY work for YOU. They need to remember that.

    • pamasaurus says:

      Thank you <3

      I keep hearing more and more stories like mine. It's so sad that this has happened to so many people! I'm sorry you've had to deal with awful doctors as well!

  6. arzea says:

    OMG I am outraged reading this. I am so sorry you are going through this. I don’t have much advice for you, unfortunately, but I do think you should continue trying to find a doctor that will listen to you. PLEASE leave a review for this doctor on Yelp, Google, whatever other review sites you can find. People need to know about this terrible doctor. I would even go as far as to report the office to the Better Business Bureau.

    • pamasaurus says:

      I’ve been leaving reviews all over the interwebs the past few days. I emailed the board of directors for the group that she works for. I’m definitely considering making a formal complaint with the state of NJ. It’s disgusting that doctors think they can treat people this way… and, from what I have heard, this isn’t an isolated incident.

      Thank you <3

  7. Lauren says:

    I think maybe some medical professionals just have the opinion that they know everything because, well, what else did they suffer through medical school for? But that is ZERO excuse for treating you like that. What a jerk!
    My “best” (worst) experience with a doctor was when I went in with a nasty rash on my chest and he said “WOW, I have no idea what that is!” and proceeded to google my symptoms. I mean…thanks dude, I did that at home.

    • pamasaurus says:

      Yeah, I get that. I know a lot of doctors probably do let the power go to their heads. They did go to medical school, so they do know more than me. You’re 100% correct, though, it doesn’t give them the right to discount my feelings and treat me (or anyone!) badly.

      It’s sad that this happens on a normal basis.

      Yeah… I can see how your situation would be annoying! At least he admitted to not knowing, though! Some doctors would’ve just pretended to know what they were talking about. Did you get the rash cleared up at least?

      • Lauren says:

        Good point! It just kinda went away on its own (and I never filled the prescription for steroids he gave me…some doctors do just kinda give medicine away).

      • pamasaurus says:

        They really do. I hear stories about people getting antibiotics for stuff that they won’t even help. There’s a fine balance between overindulging patients and totally discounting them. I’ve heard of few doctors who walk the line consistently.

        Glad it went away, though!!

  8. mhdriver says:

    .Pam you may remember me by this statement, Everything tastes better with Jack Daniels. I feel your pain, I had an incident with an outpatient surgery. Had to have a trigger finger released, it was the middle finger on my right hand. I know this is not as bad as what your going through. Any way on the way to the hospital we got a call from the hospital that I hadn’t completed my labs, therefore couldn’t do the surgery. Wife told them to hold on and turned told me to turn right at Dr Chada’s office. She got back to the person that was on hold, that person from the hospital said Dr Chada we have him (me) down for Dr ??. We went to the hospital – to admissions then the waiting area to be called. Reading the admission papers they had me down for the wrong finger and the wrong hand. Went back to admissions told them of the mistake and she asked what finger was it, I told you it was my middle finger, Sooo I flipped her a BIRD. Got into surgery the nurse asked what finger are we doing to day, So I flipped her the bird, The Dr came in and asked what finger are we doing today —- So I flipped him the Bird and told now sign the dam thing.. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. I hope this makes you laugh a little this is a true story . I took a negative and turned it into a positive. Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. Ask for what you want, Dr’s are just people.

    • pamasaurus says:

      Everything really does taste better with Jack Daniels ;)

      And, yes, I do remember that statement.

      Thanks for sharing your story! It definitely made me laugh. You’re totally right, too, doctors are human. They make mistakes like the rest of us. It just sucks that their mistakes can have huge consequences.

      Hopefully they finally got everything figured out and fixed the right finger! Otherwise, you’d still be flipping everyone off!

  9. mhdriver says:

    Pami I just nominated for the Ligo Circle of Appreciation. This not an award it is just an Appreciation. You can see it at my blog http://mhdriver.wordpress.com.

  10. Nicole :) says:

    WOW! Do. Not. Give. Up! Sorry that you are going through this frustration. I can totally relate as I mention in my blog I have experienced my fair share of uncooperative doctors who did nothing to help me…it is why I am self-diagnosed gluten intolerant. I do believe that soon enough I will find the right doctor who can help and not make me feel like I have imaginary problems! Ugggh.

    You’ve gotten some great comments and advice – YOU deserve much better, keep looking till you find a good doctor who can give you an answer (you WILL find one, they are out there) and make complaints where you can! You are absolutely right, YOU know your body better than anyone and can tell when something is wrong. The only thing I can add is amidst the piles of crazy stuff there is a wealth of information on the internet…..you just have to weed out the nonsense. It was they way I found a solution to my issues.

    • pamasaurus says:

      <3 Thanks so much! I have, since this post, been to a new doctor who referred me to an endocrinologist. I have that appointment on the 30th. I'm also seeing a GYN on the 14th of November (earliest appointment for a new patient) as another resource. So *fingers crossed* one of these doctors can help.

      I really hope that you can find a doctor to help you. It's so hard when you're so sure you know what is wrong and everyone keeps brushing you off. Good luck with your search as well!

  11. Juliet says:

    Oh, I’m so sorry you had to go through this. I would have felt the same way you did by the doctor’s lack of care and concern. I have a history of miscarriages, and I’ve had issues with an OB/GYN doctor these last few years. I was so frustrated with how she handled my last pregnancy (and miscarriage), I won’t go back to her.

    Many years ago, my sweet aunt felt terrible all the time and tried to tell her doctor about the symptoms. The doctor pushed her concerns aside and told her it was all in her head. Months later, she was diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer. It was such a heartbreaking and unnecessary situation. I was eighteen at the time, and I remember my mom telling me to never be afraid to get a second, third, fourth opinion, etc. Like you said, you know your body better than anyone else, and so if you’re not feeling well, then there’s something wrong.

    I’m so glad to hear you’re not giving up. I’ll be praying that you find a doctor that is caring and willing to really listen to you and give you a correct diagnosis.

    • pamasaurus says:

      Thank you <3

      I'm sorry you had to go through everything you listed here, both with your doctor and with your aunt. It's terrible how doctors brush people off like that. Hopefully you find a doctor that you like now! I've slowly learned that we don't have to put up with this… you're paying them for a service; if you don't like it, fire them!

      I have since been to a new doctor who has referred me to an endocrinologist. I'm just waiting for my appointment on the 30th now.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s